Performativity and Anti-Marketing

Part of my hangup in completing a portfolio stems from the hopefully misplaced idea that exterior presentation demands the highest degree of polish. Designers know that Dribbble posts are well beyond a realistic pale, but that doesn’t prevent a tweaking, twinging intrusion — “oh, it could be better.” Despite knowing that pale skews on multiple axi — not only is the public persona unrealistically polished, it’s simply unbelievable.

Yet there’s a constant comparison. Not necessarily, or at all against Dribbble, but against this idea that one’s standard is perfection, one’s work is never truly perfect, and therefore one’s work never meets one’s standards. At the same time, others visibly publish, post, engage, and so clearly their work meets their standards.

Still writing this — Dribbble’s not a personal trigger for imposter syndrome, but broader comparison against experienced professionals can be.